Beware of Risky Emotional Involvements Too Early

September 30 - No matter what other people do or don't do, for ourselves we have to remain abstinent from gambling.  When our program of recovery becomes contingent of the actions or inactions of another person - especially someone with whom we're emotionally involved - the results are invariably disastrous.  We also need to remember that intense dislike is as much an emotional involvement as new-found romantic love.  In short, we have to cool any risky emotional involvements in the first few months of our recovery, tyring to accept the fact that our feelings can change quickly and dramatically.  Our watch word must be "First Things First," concentrating on our number one problem, recovery from compulsive gambling, before anything else.

Am I building a firm foundation while steering clear of slippery emotional areas?

Today I Pray - May I always remember that healthy relationships with people are necessary for my recovery, but that substituting an obsession with either a love or hate object is as dangerous to my well-being as any other addiction.

Today I Will Remember - A dependency is a dependency is a dependency. 

Relationships are Tricky for Gamblers

September 29 - In our first weeks or months in Gamblers Anonymous, our shaky emotional condition sometimes affects our feelings toward old friends and family.  For many of us, these relationships heal quickly in the initial stages of our recovery.  For others, a time of "touchiness" seems to persist; now that we're no longer gambling compulsively, we have to sort out our feelings about spouses, children, relatives, employers, fellow workers, and even neighbors.  Experience in the GA Program over the years teaches us that we should avoid making important decisions early in our recovery - especially emotion-charged decisions about people.

Am I becoming better equipped to relate maturely to other people?

Today I Pray - May God help me through the edginess, the confusion of re-feeling and re-thinking my relationships, the getting it all together stages of my recovery.  May I not rush into new relationships or new situations that demand an investment of my emotions - not yet.

Today I Will Remember - No entangling alliances too soon.

Be a Giver, Not a Constant Taker

September 28 - Now that we're free from our compulsion to gamble, and living life one day at a time, we can begin to stop making unreasonable demands upon those we love.  We can show kindness where we had shone none; we can take the time and initiative to be thoughtful, considerate, and compassionate.  Even with people we dislike, we can at least try to be courteous, at times literally going out of our way to understand and help them.

Just for today, will I try to understand rather than be understood, being courteous and respectful to all people with whom I'm in contact?

Today I Pray - May I never forget my old sponge-like self, who soaked up every drop of affection and attention my family or friends could give me, until they were sapped dry.  May I learn to be a giver, rather than a constant taker.  May I practice offering interest, kindness, consideration, and compassion until sensitivity to others becomes second nature to me.

Today I Will Remember - Giving is part of being.

Depend on the Right Power

September 27 - In times past, even as adults, many of us childishly insisted that people protect, defend, and care for us.  We acted as if the world owed US a living.  And then, when the people we most loved became fed up, pushing us aside or perhaps abandoning us completely, we were bewildered.  We couldn't see that our over dependence on people was unsuccessful because all human beings are fallible; even the best of them will sometimes let us down, especially when our demands are unreasonable.  Today, in contract, we rely upon God, counting on Him rather than on exclusively on ourselves or other people.

Am I tyring to do as I think God would have me do, trusting the outcome of His will for me?

Today I Pray - May I know, from the dependencies of my past, that I am a dependent person.  As I depended on compulsive gambling, I was inclined, too, to hang onto other people, depending on them for more than they could give.  May I, at last, switch from those adolescent dependencies to a mature, healthy dependency on my Higher Power.

Today I Will Remember - I have more than one dependency.

Experience a Full Awakening

September 26 - Is freedom form compulsive gambling all that we're to expect form a spiritual awakening?  Not at all.  Freedom from our addiction is only the bare beginnings; it's only the first gift of our first awaking.  Obviously, if more gifts are to come our way, our awakening has to continue.  As it does continue, we find that slowly but surely we can scrap the old life - the one that didn't work - for a new life that can and does work under any and all conditions.

Am I willing to continue my awakening through the practice of the Twelve Steps of Recovery? 

Today I Pray - May I remember how it was when my only goal in life was to be free of compulsive gambling.  All the words and phrases I used were stoppers - "giving it up, quitting, cutting myself off."  Once I was free, I began to realize that my freedom had more to do with beginning than stopping.  May I now continue to think in terms of starters - "expanding, awakening, growing, learning, becoming..."

Today I Will Remember - My stopping was a starting point.

Write a Recovery Inventory

September 25 - At the suggestion of a long-timer in Gamblers Anonymous, I began taking "recovery inventories" periodically.  The results showed me - clearly and unmistakably - that the promises of the GA Program have been true for me.  I am not the sick person I was in years past; I am no longer bankrupt in all areas; I have a new life and a path to follow, and I'm at peace with myself most of the time.  And that's a far cry from the time in my life when I dreaded facing each new day.  Perhaps we should all write recovery inventories form time to time, showing how the Program is working for each of us.

Just for today, will I try to sow faith where there is fear?

Today I Pray - God, let me compare my new life with the old one - just to see how things have changed for me.  May I make progress reports for myself now and then - and for those who are new to GA.  May these reports be - heartening - about "what I am doing" rather than - smugly - about "what I have done."

Today I Will Remember - Has the Program kept its promise?  Have I kept mine?

Tend to your Garden

September 24 - "Everybody wants to be somebody, nobody wants to grow," wrote Goethe.  I ask myself sometimes, as we all do: Who am I?  Where am I?  Where am I going?  What's it all about?  The learning and growing process is usually slow.  But eventually our seeking always brings a finding.  What seems like great mysteries often turn out to be enshrined in complete simplicity.

Have I accepted the fact that my willingness to grow is the essence of my spiritual development?

Today I Pray - God give me the patience and the perseverance to keep on hoeing the long row, even when the end of it is out of sight.  The principles of the Gamblers Anonymous Program are my almanac for growing, even more than harvesting.  The harvest will come, abundant enough to share, if I can just stick to my garden-tending.

Today I Will Remember - Getting there, not being there.